How Do Children Affect Your Social Circles?

When I found out I was expecting I burst into tears.  I didn’t cry because little Liam was a horrible accident – my husband and I had been hoping for a baby for a while – I cried because my life was over. From that second onwards, gone was my ability to drink, eat whatever I wanted, do whatever I wanted and to spend money like it was nothing. Suddenly I went from being a 22 year old who was confident and able to do whatever she wanted, to a woman who had no idea on what life had in store for her anymore.

My husband and I are extremely lucky in the fact that we’re one of the last couples in our social circle to actually conceive a human being. While I do find it a little concerning that at the tender young age of 22 we were one of the last child free couples (A story for another time, perhaps), it was a massive relief to know that whatever problem we had, we had a support network of people who have done it all before and would probably be able to help.

When I broke the news at work I suddenly found myself being inundated by other mums who were beaming at me with joy. Some of these people I barely even knew, but the simple fact that I was an incubator for a succubus was enough for us to apparently have some new-found deep and meaningful connection. Its something that I really struggled with. I’m a geeky tomboy who at that point in my life had no mothering instinct whatsoever. Even now I kindly decline when someone offers me their child to hold, and the mere sight of baby vomit makes me want to bring up my lunch in sympathy, and yet here I was surrounded by clucky ladies who wanted to offer me so much “advice” that I thought my head would explode! I was glad when I left that place.

The most interesting responses would have to have come from the singles in our social circle. My best friend, who is so much like me in how she interacts with babies, was over the moon for us. My husbands best friend reminded me of a fish out of water when we told him. Others just kind of ignored it, some were ecstatic, and in one unique case, a close friend started a meme about how he plans to eat Liam once he’s born (After many discussions, he has decided that its best to boil the baby). Of course, he doesn’t actually intend to eat our baby and has been an amazing support to me throughout this whole pregnancy. In fact, he’s been absolutely amazing and has helped me through some pretty hard times. I’m still expecting him to rock up at the maternity ward with a pot though!

Everyone close to us is well aware that I’m pregnant and it isn’t a big deal anymore. With 58 days left to go before Liam makes his glorious arrival into the world, I’m beginning to realise that this lovely “honeymoon” period that we’re having with our friends is about to end. Liam will go from being a silent entity living inside me who can easily be ignored, to being a very LOUD little person who will demand all of our attention. Gone will be the days of parties at our place, three day LANs and going to lunch with friends; to be replaced with play dates and picnics at the park.

Will my social circle shrink to only include other people who have children, or will my single friends who aren’t ready to be around kids surprise me and be an active part of my life? I guess only time will tell.